Let Them Talk - You’re Too Busy Evolving

If there’s one thing people love more than gossip, it’s holding you hostage to the person you used to be. They’ll pin you down to an old version of yourself like you’re some relic in a museum. “Oh, remember when she was so much fun?” “She used to be way more chill.” “She’s changed.” No shit, I’ve changed. You should try it sometime.

We love the idea of growth, but only when it’s happening to someone else, somewhere else. Not when it’s inconvenient. Not when it forces people to rethink the way they knew you. Because when you evolve, it disrupts their comfortable little idea of you, and suddenly, they don’t know where they stand. And instead of adjusting, instead of meeting you where you are, they’d rather critique.

I’ve felt it. We all have. That weird tension when people don’t quite know what to do with the new you. Maybe you stopped saying yes to every invitation. Maybe you outgrew conversations that used to feel thrilling but now feel… small. Maybe you started prioritising different things …your health, your career, your sanity. And suddenly, the people who used to be in your corner are side-eyeing you like you’ve committed a crime. “You’re different now.” Yeah, I hope so. The goal was never to stay the same.

And let’s be clear: Change is not betrayal. It’s not a personal attack on who you used to be or the people you were once close to. It’s a natural, necessary part of moving forward. Could you imagine still making the same choices, having the same mindset, dressing the same way, thinking the same thoughts as you did five, ten years ago? Terrifying. Growth isn’t the enemy. Stagnation is.

I think back to the times I wasn’t changing. The times I stayed in situations, friendships, even mindsets that no longer fit, just to avoid making people uncomfortable. And you know what? It felt awful. It felt like wearing a jacket three sizes too small, restricting, suffocating, just not me anymore. But I kept trying to squeeze into it because I was scared of what people would say if I let it go. The truth is, people will talk regardless. The only question is: Are you going to let their opinions keep you in a place you’ve outgrown?

And look, I’m not going to pretend like it’s easy. I miss those moments from the past, the people, the late nights, the reckless fun, the version of me that existed in those memories. But that’s the thing, they’re memories. Beautiful, meaningful, and locked in time. And that’s where they should stay. Some people were meant to be part of your life for a season, and it’s okay to let them go with love. They were exactly what you needed at that moment in your life. And now, you need something different.

I’ve always believed that constraints, whether in creativity, business, or personal growth, force you to innovate and push forward. Losing people, losing parts of yourself, shedding old identities - it can feel like a limitation, like a loss. But what if it’s actually the push you need to step into something greater? What if outgrowing people is just another way of making space for the right ones?

We evolve, not because we’re ungrateful for what was, but because we’re ready for what’s next. And if you really think about it, how lucky are we to have had those moments at all? To have known those people, shared those laughs, felt that deep connection - even if it didn’t last forever. Some of the most incredible relationships of my life were with people I don’t even speak to anymore. And that’s okay. They mattered. That time mattered. But I don’t need to stay the same just to hold onto them.

There’s something really powerful about stepping into the person you’re becoming without apology. About saying, this is me now, and not needing a round of applause or permission. Because not everyone will get it. Some will project their own fears onto you, assuming your growth is an indictment of their lack of it. Others will try to bring you back down, like crabs in a bucket, because your evolution makes them question why they haven’t moved. But the right people? They won’t just accept your growth, they’ll celebrate it. They’ll see the way you’re evolving and want to grow alongside you.

So if you’re in that weird, in-between stage, where you know you’ve changed, but not everyone has caught up yet… keep going. Keep becoming. Let them talk. Let them wonder. Let them miss the old you, while you fully embrace the version of yourself that was waiting all along. And if you’re struggling, if the nostalgia feels too loud, just remember this: You’re not leaving those moments behind. You’re carrying them with you, woven into everything you’re becoming.